This is not one of those blogs you read about the health benefits of exercise and how it dramatically changed my life.
It’s about how I became an F45 wanker, for all the wrong reasons.
Somehow, despite my love of a Maccas detour on the way to work I’ve turned into someone who sets their alarm at 5:35am and enjoys sweating with strangers. Who you do not have to talk to I might add. Everyone just pretends to be looking at the demo screen, trying not to notice that the communal yoga mat/bike seat/sandbag is covered in other peoples sweat. Then in 45 minutes your done. Cooked.
I joined F45 2 weeks before Christmas in the hope that I could eat and drink as much festive cheer as possible over the silly season, and not be reduced to wearing leggings as pants indefinitely. I smashed the one week trial and even considered doing double sessions just to get the most out of it. I had no intention of actually signing up. Then I got on the scales.
Originally I thought exercise would help me lose a few kegs. But, thus far I’ve only lost a kilo and to be honest I’m ok with it. I’ve thrown out all my belly tops and I’m not ashamed to say that I own more than one item from the Asos maternity range. Heaps comfy.
But here I am paying a fortune to be yelled at and my 6 pack is still covered in cake! So how did I become one of those F45 wankers?!
First of all, it’s only 45 minutes. It’s not very long and you can just get in and get it done. Basically it takes the same amount of time to watch one episode of The Real Housewives of anywhere!
By doing the 6am class I’m home by 6.50am. Which means I then have 1 hour and 20 minutes to myself in the morning. That’s a like a lifetime to me. I make a coffee then sit on the couch and watch the morning shows in my knickers. Sometimes I even iron my work outfit.
Also, I have a crush on one of the trainers. Because she never yells at me and only wants to talk shit about her weekend.
Look I’m sure I’m getting fitter, losing weight (slowly) and prolonging my life span but I admit I became an F45 for all the wrong reasons.
This new found exercise enthusiasm is more of a shock to me than it is to you. I mean really, who wants to spend their wine budget on getting out of bed to jump off boxes?!